Dreamsong
by Natsuki
Summary: Inspired by Walt Whitman's 'The Sleepers', Hitomi tries to sort out her memories and feelings for what she left behind on Gaea. Definite WAFF warning. Note: On Hiatus.
1. Dreaming Dreams

_'I wander all night in my vision,'_   
  
The words struck a chord in Hitomi's soul - it was a line so familiar   
to her that it was startling. She leaned closer to the book, frowning   
slightly at the English words which so eluded her grasp. It was, after   
all, her choice to read it or not.   
  
A faint smile touched her lips as the next few lines gradually   
appeared under her pen: 

_'Stepping with light feet, swiftly and noiselessly stepping and stopping,_   
_Bending with open eyes over the shut eyes of sleepers,_   
_Wandering and confused, lost to myself, ill assorted, contradictory,_   
_Pausing, gazing, bending and stopping.'_   
  
Still more familiar words - Hitomi's green eyes glowed with memories.   
She'd been so confused about her visions, the unsolicited invasion of   
her mind with chaotic images of pain, death and destruction. There had   
been one anchor - and here, Hitomi's eyes darkened slightly - but he   
was gone. Not precisely so, but out of her physical reach, and barely   
within her mental grasp. 

"Van," she whispered, and a picture of his face appeared, that rare   
smile, reserved just for her upon his face. She smiled in return, and   
the vision disappeared in a blue sparkle. Hitomi, with a sigh, returned   
to her translating. The next two lines held no real meaning to her, but   
those after that drew one crystal-clear tear from one eye, trickling   
down her cheek. 

'_The wretched features of ennuyes, the white features of corpses, the_   
_livid faces of drunkards, the sick-gray faces of onanists,_   
_The gash'd bodies on battle-fields, the insane in their strong-door'd_   
_rooms, the scared idiots, the new-born emerging from gazes, the dying_   
_emerging from gates,_   
_The night pervades them and enfolds them.'_

The deaths of so many were etched in her memory, the blood spilled to   
gain her power rested heavily upon her concience - only the fact that   
her love for Van had saved Gaea, and that he didn't blame her for her   
power kept her sane. The night, indeed, had its power over her: the   
power of memory. To distract her mind from that, she bent her head to   
the translation, wisps of golden-brown hair tickling her neck. 

_'The married couple sleep calmly in their bed, he with his palm on the_   
_hip of the wife, and she with her palm on the hip of the husband.'_

That line brought a faint, tender smile to Hitomi's solemn face - she   
often dreamed of such seeming bliss; the love between she and Van had   
save a world's future, but it had been so new, or rather,   
newly-discovered, that they had been unsure of themselves... and had   
separated. They could see eachother, but never touch, and they never   
wished for eachother's company... for fear of rejection. 

Hitomi shut the book with a snap, setting it back in her track bag.   
Glancing around, wind riffling through her short hair, she smiled   
faintly. It figured... she'd come to the track to relax, to read, and   
to think. She'd gone through so much here... Gaea, the world only she   
could see, hung behind the half-risen moon, sparkling blue, brown, and   
green. 

A cheerful voice penetrated Hitomi's thoughts - Yukari, her red-purple   
hair flying, tackled her best friend. "Konnichiwa!" she chirped,   
grinning. 

"Hello, yourself, Yukari-chan," chuckled Hitomi, green eyes alight.   
"Got those statistics all done already?" Yukari had, as always, been   
straightening out the track team's practice times, compiling them into   
the neat ledger she kept. 

"Un. Just don't be late again." Yukari commented, waggling her finger   
admonishingly at Hitomi, who simply blushed. 

"Gomen. Sensei made me stay after class to discuss more about Newton.   
He seems to think I know too much about him," she explained. It was   
true, she mused, she /did/ know more about Isaac than was in the   
course, but that wasn't any reason, in Hitomi's opinion, to continue to   
detain her, making her late for whatever else she had to do.   
  
"Ne, Hitomi... did you hear? Amano's coming back for a visit!" Again,   
the bright commend drew Hitomi out of her thoughts, forcing her to   
focus upon Yukari. "I get to see him again!" 

Hitomi'd known, of course, but she wasn't all that interested anymore.   
Her infatuation with Amano had been on a par with her liking of   
Allen... it paled when... 

"Hitomi... ne, Hitomi, you awake?" enquired Yukari, waving a hand in   
front of Hitomi's eyes, eliciting a startled blink. "You've been weird   
ever since Amano left... are you sure you don't mind that we're..." 

"Of course not." Which wasn't precisely the truth; she saw Yukari and   
Amano together, and was ever reminded of her soul's other half, the   
half that was with Van, on Gaea. Yukari's chatter faded into the   
background as Hitomi's mind wandered back to her life in Gaea. She   
could almost see the rebuilt Fanelia she saw so often in Van's thoughts. 

***************** 

A flash of red amongst blue-green foliage alerted Merle to the arrival   
of her oldest friend. Though somewhat matured, Merle remained what she   
was: a cat - posessive, mischevious and unpredictable. At least she   
didn't tackle Van anymore.   
  
"Van-sama..." she ventured, then halted. This was Folken's tomb... not   
a place Merle normally entered without invitation. 

"Merle." The tone was somewhat dark, but there was a faint humor   
interlaced in Van's voice. "It's okay, you can come in." 

The owner of the voice stepped out from a fall of ivy, a few misplaced   
tendrils clinging to his arms and dark hair. Maturity had left its   
marks upon the young king; tanned skin was stretched by lathe-like   
muscles, and there were shadows in his red-brown eyes. 

Merle padded in, peeking around warily. Escaflowne, dormant and dark,   
was half-hidden by tendrils of ivy, shrouding the white guymelef in   
leafy camoflauge. Folken's tomb was also hidden by the plant that had   
sprouted so quickly; a sign, perhaps, of the regrowth all of Gaea was   
undergoing. Van stood, red shirt a bright spot against the dark vines,   
against the guymelef, staring at Merle curiously. 

"E-eto..." Merle began, scratching at her nead in embarrassment. "I   
was outside, and I saw you come in here, so I followed you." 

A smile, rare these days, quirked Van's lips. "Merle, I don't mind."   
He remained as terse as ever, though there was an ever-present tint of   
loneliness in his voice, ever since Hitomi had gone. His shadowed   
red-brown eyes liften to stare at the Mystic moon, and a soft sigh,   
matching, though he wouldn't know, Hitomi's own.   
  
"You're thinking about her again," came Merle's statement. She seened   
to have a sixth sense about her oldest friend's thoughts... especially   
when they came to her former rival. 

Van's eyes darkened - Merle was correct, as always when concerning   
Hitomi. "I was. I know she hasn't forgotten me... she promised she   
wouldn't," he said, leaning against Escaflowne's bent knee, "And I can   
still see her sometimes..." He knew in his soul that they couldn't   
really be apart; their hearts beat as one, but something within him   
still ached to be sure. He wanted to ask her, face to face. 

Merle simply watched the expressions flicker across her oldest   
friend's face: depression, remembered happiness, and love were   
predominant, with a faint hope intruding upon them at times. Her tail   
lashed angrily - she too thought of the odd girl from the Mystic Moon,   
though with less longing (of course) than Van. She missed Hitomi's calm   
presence and the comfort she'd often provided the younger, motherless   
catgirl... and then, she worried about Van. He, in spite of his   
apparent strength, was the weaker of the two, as far as feelings   
went... Hitomi was his other half, and he needed her to lean on. 

"I don't understand..." she mused aloud, "Why did Hitomi leave?" It   
was only when she heard a faint intake of breath from the man next to   
her that she realized she'd spoken aloud, and winced. She'd asked   
before, once, but had been rebuffed by Van's silence. 

An unaccustomed roughness was in Van's voice as he finally replied, "I   
don't know. Neither of us know..." 

"... then why don't you go find her, Van-sama? I told you this before,   
and Hitomi has, too. People return your feelings." 

That same lightness from long ago fluttered against Van's chest.   
Neither he nor Hitomi had dared wish for the other's presence... for   
fear of destroying something elusive, something un-quantifiable. He   
would dare, now. He had to see her. 

*********************** 

A breath of wind stirred in a darkened room, tendrils of breeze   
tugging gently at a particular drawer with an almost-human touch. The   
solitary occupant of the room slept on as the drawer slipped open,   
allowing the wind to snatch a particular card out of a deck hidden   
away. It gusted, and the card fluttered gently over to Hitomi's bed,   
settling softly on the coverlet. 

An errant strand of golden-brown hair, teased into motion by an breath   
of wind, awakened Hitomi. Green eyes snapped open, fastening upon the   
card in front of her, on her coverlet. 

"How...?" she murmured, then stared at the card. Il Fusco/La Luce.   
Hitomi bolted upright, ignoring the dizzy rush of blood from her head,   
in favor of another, sweeter rush of feeling. For beside the card lay   
one pure-white feather. Those old words, so beloved, rushed to her lips: 

"He's calling me." 

************************ 

A pulse of pink light was visible from the energist as Van headed back   
to the tomb; it knew what was to come. A matching pulse was beating   
from the pendant, so cherished, around Van's neck -- the beat of its   
owner's heart was in time with the one wearing it. 

Van paused, making sure he was alone, then removed his shirt. A faint   
smile twitched at the corner of his lips as the white wings unfolded   
behind him, his ryuugin heritage in physical form. Words, oddly echoed,   
rang out: 

"Take me there." 

Blue-white light flared up from the energist, surrounding the winged   
figure. From a window nearby, Merle smiled. 

************************ 

A brown and tan blur rushed out of the house, not minding the slam of   
the door behind her -- her parents, or, at least, her mother, would   
understand why she had to go. 

Hitomi paused at the edge of the track, still clutching the precious   
card to her chest. Her heart thudded against her hand, but she could   
feel, through that card, the beat of another heart, in time with her   
own. 

Her voice, oddly echoed, as though two were speaking as one, rang out: 

"Take me there." 

*************   



	2. Waking Thoughts

Dreamsong Chapter Two Those three words were a catalyst. What had been simple pink   
stone flared blue, and even the sleeping Dragon's heart beat once,   
twice, three times in response to the call. 

Merle leaped back as though burned, every inch of her fur   
standing on end. Van was standing, wings unfurled and eyes closed, in   
the middle of the tomb's clearing. To her sensitive ears, his voice   
had sounded odd; there'd been a counterpoint, a higher, feminine   
voice behind his deeper tenor. That didn't explain the electric   
feeling in the air, the current of... something that set every nerve   
on edge. 

The light intensified, going from simple azure to such a   
pitch that Merle wondered how Van could stand it, even with his eyes   
closed. And then, as quickly as it had started, it stopped. The   
catgirl opened her eyes a crack, then, stunned, stared at the scene   
before her. 

**************** 

It was a familiar feeling, the binding sensation of the   
witchlight that surrounded Hitomi. Warm and powerful; she could   
almost drown in it if she didn't take care. 

Behind closed eyelids, flashes of memory played: 

_She was trapped in a darkness that was not her body, nor anywhere she_   
_knew. The doppelganger had fled already, and Hitomi knew that there_   
_was little chance she could do the same. Flee to where? There was no_   
_sliver of light to guide her, no way to know if she still lived or if_   
_she was dead.___

_Glimmers of light in the distance, a boy's voice calling frantically_   
_for her to open her eyes, to live. She knew that voice. Van. He was_   
_making her heart beat in time with his, and, in this place, wishes_   
_were almost tangible. He was wishing for her to live.___

_Her eyes opened, and she began to cough uncontrollably._   


_His arms were wrapped around her and she could feel his reluctance to_   
_let her go. She had tears in her eyes, but a smile lingered about her_   
_lips; she was going home, and she had grown strong enough to be on_   
_her own, not depending on others for her own life and emotional cues.___

_He lifted one of his arms away from her, the one with the energist in_   
_it, and the sparkle of the blue light surrounded them both. She_   
_smiled and surrendered to the warmth. "I'll never forget you..."_   


She was being lifted by warm currents of air, then she was   
gone. The minute quiver in the power went un-noticed... until she   
arrived. 

*************************** 

Flickering blue-white energy licked at Van's arms as he   
struggled to control it. It wasn't the tame power he'd touched   
before, nor was anything even remotely like his previous experiences   
with controlling it. This was a flood, a raging flow of energy that   
refused to be tamed, even by a ryuugin. 

As easily as it had come, the light faded away, leaving the   
young King staring at the innocent pendant in fear. The power of   
wishes was not to be tampered with. And he'd just had that fact   
forced into his face. 

Merle shook herself out of her shock and launched herself at   
the man, fur still standing on edge. "Van-sama, you weren't hurt,   
were you? What happened? Where's Hitomi? Something went wrong, didn't   
it?" Her voice had a hysterical tint to it that brought Van's   
thoughts back to reality with a rather harsh thud. "Van-sama..." 

"I don't know! Something went wrong, yes, Merle; it was   
different than it was before," he replied tersely, banishing his   
wings in a spray of feathers. "I don't know where Hitomi is. I can't   
feel her anywhere. She's not on the Mystic Moon, I know. She has to   
be on Gaea." Van closed his eyes, hands still clenched on the   
pendant. Slowly, he thought about his personal view of Hitomi -- the   
shape of her face, the silky feel of her hair, her smile and the way   
she moved -- and focused that view into the pendant. It was   
dangerous, but he... he had to find her. 

Only the vaguest sense of fright and no small amount of   
startled recognition reached him. The pendant swung aimlessly, not   
indicating any particular direction. It was puzzling, to say the   
least. 

The first indication that day had turned to night was a   
shiver that dislodged a few loose feathers from Van's shoulders. He   
stared upwards, oddly comforted by the sight of the Phantom Moon. He   
nodded abruptly at some inner reflection, then turned to Merle. "We   
have to go organize a search party and send carrier pigeons to   
Asturia and the other countries; Hitomi could be in any of them. I   
can't find her with the pendant." And that troubled him. 

Taking the fastest routes through the maze-like gardens, the   
young King returned to his rooms, miraculously having avoided any   
querying glances from maids and the like about his lack of a shirt.   
Hell, he was King. He could afford another shirt. 

"Merle, please tell my advisors I will be missing tonight's   
session. Tell them that it's personal business and that I do not want   
to be disturbed," he said, tossing a warm shirt on. He paused only   
briefly, sighing. 

A king's duty was never complete; thus, his father had   
instituted a system of advisors for the king, trustworthy people who   
wielded power in the King's stead. Goau had run the kingdom well; in   
spite of its small size, it was one of the most profitable and the   
richest in natural resources, and those advisors rarely voted against   
their King. In one thing only had they gone against Goau: the matter   
of Varie, Van's mother. 

Though she had been everything a queen had to be --   
brilliant, cultured and strong -- the advisors had been against the   
very thought of Goau wedding a ryuugin, one of the Cursed Ones. The   
disaster that she was supposed to bring had not happened in her   
generation; rather, the complete destruction of Fanelia by one of her   
own sons had, in the former advisors' opinions, fully justified their   
fears. 

Their fears of ryuugin had not faded in the face of Van's   
actions during the Great War, and that made his work with them   
considerably harder. Turning towards the door and noting Merle's   
absence, he smiled only briefly. He'd replaced a quarter of the old   
advisors with the new, younger people. They were nominally in charge   
of the reconstruction, but had stayed on the council even after much   
of the work was done, and Van was more comfortable dealing with them   
than the older, more political advisors. 

Shaking his head to dispel such thoughts -- at the moment, he   
did not wish to be a King, only someone searching for his loved one --   
Van strode out of the room, cutting across the moonlit courtyard on   
his way to the pigeon loft. The castle had been rebuilt as similar as   
his people's memory could reconstruct it, but there was always that   
subtle tint of difference, the scent of fresh-cut wood that had long   
ago been leached out of the old castle. It was one of the things that   
occasionally surprised him about his home, that sense of old   
familiarity that suddenly vanished upon turning a corner and seeing   
something missing. 

The loft, however, had not changed from its former place. The   
bird handler had been the one to design the old room, and he had   
memorized the blueprints upon drawing them. 

"Ah, Van-" The old man smiled at the King he'd known since   
youth. "-have messages to send, do you?" He never had to call Van by   
his title, and Van had never insisted upon it. It would be   
impossible -- he'd spent quite a bit of his youth here, watching the   
birds fly. He felt a kinship with them, in a sense. 

He nodded, reaching for a piece of parchment and a quill.   
With a swift hand, he wrote a letter to Allen and handed it to the   
old man. "To Asturia. As quickly as a pigeon can take it." 

He sent others, their destinations ranging from Basram to   
Millerna-hime in Asturia, each with a terse message to look for the   
Seeress of the Great War: a girl with short, sandy brown hair, green   
eyes and an odd manner of dress. 

Van simply hoped that she was somewhere safe. 

*************************************** 

Hitomi was, in fact, in one of the least safe places on Gaea. 

It was not Zaibach -- that would have been safe enough for   
her. 

It was the Dragon's Nest, the hidden portion of Fanelia's   
forest that held the highest concentration of dragons on the planet.   
And these were dragons that were bent on protecting their younglings. 

********************** End Part Two ******************   



End file.
